You may or may not have heard recently from my sainted mother (peace be upon her) that my fat whore of a sister (may she rot in hell) just *cough* earned *cough* her Canine Good Citizen certificate, passing the tests with flying colors. Well, my friends, those colors run, unlike my fat whore of a sister (msrih), who really kind of slides about like salted slug.
Sometimes my mother (pbuh) is really deluded. Canine Good Citizen??? Who is she trying to kid? Everybody can get that. EVERYBODY. Not only is it the most mediocre sounding award I have ever heard of, but it is also a mere piece of paper. That's right. No stars, stripes, shining metal on an immaculate white coat, military music, tear jerking hymn singing, brindle on bitch action, er... where were we? She can pretty much keep her Poodle Certified Jerk tabloid extract. I have THREE purple hearts, one Medal of Honor, four silver stars, and 1,234 Distinguished Barking Crosses. None of these medals would look even remotely good on a crap and tar, I mean black and tan coat. I am sick and tired of putting up with her (msrih) and/or the Interloper (may his pathetic shriveled wiener disappear entirely in a random quantum fluctuation).
Some people have been heavily criticizing me on the way I conduct the eviction process. This brings me to my second topic. When I said earlier "We are winning this war", I really meant "We are going to win this war". By we, I mean my sainted mother (pbuh) and myself (pbum). So, We have been stuck with my fat whore of a sister (msrih) for how long? Seven years? And how long have we been stuck with the interloper (mhpswdeiarqf)? 18 months? I think calling it a quagmire is stretching the truth in a very LIE-beral kind of way. Nonetheless, I have decided to pay heed to the will of the American People and read the Interloper Study Group Report on the (Cold) nose war.
There are two kind of things amongst the 79 pieces of worthless commie advice in that brilliant piece of intellectual onanism. First, ideas that would lead to a victory at home. Well, DUH. I have already come up with those, which is, by the way, why we are going to win this war. I mean, these ideas are merely excerpts from my speeches. The second kind is ideas that would lead to a defeat at home. Defeat being defined here as having the black thingy and the yellow bastard stay. I reject these ideas entirely as the ejaculations of godless cowards they are. Some of them were written in French, I kid you not. I had to sanitize my nose after reading it.
Now, having read the ISGR, and having considered its proposals, I am pushing forward my idea of a surge of brindle to control the situation.
Thank you, and God Bless My Beloved Mommy, These Stars and Stripes, and The AmeriCAN Way.
Bark (1,235 DBC's)
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Hey Billie,
Maybe you need a vacation...perhaps your Mom could take you to a spa...enjoy the world.
Merry Christmas.
M-the-V
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The place was eery with the ghost of dead effort; but it pleased him. avapro. I dare you to walk downstairs and provera say, 'We-just-dropped-in-to-call-on-Miss-Champe'! he said.. ' I'm so glad for him. insulin. Podington with the expected alprazolam invitation to take a sail.. , a solicitude, and is not the very transparent father's dream mentioned above of just such a nature? From the gleam of light falling into his eyes while asleep the father draws the solicitous conclusion that a candle has been upset and may thyroid have set fire to the corpse; he transforms this conclusion into a dream by investing it with a senseful situation enacted in the present tense.. She wrested consolation from it by mere force of magnesium will.. The next Inmate looked as if he might colchicine have been a sailor formerly.. It is then the purpose of the dream that this brother should remain in the right; and she does not try to justify this brother merely in the dream; it is her purpose in life and the motive for her being vicodin ill.. But he did not oftenest frequent the banqueting hall, where were endless hospitality and feasting--nor did he loiter much in reception rooms, where a throng of new visitors was forever swarming--nor did he feed his vanity by haunting the pepcid apartment in which were stored the trophies of his varied triumphs--nor dream much in the great gallery hung with pictures of his travels.. None were left thyroid but Hester, the great French scholar, who, being one of those young imps that seem to have the faculty of living without sleep, sat bolt upright with her eyes wide open, watching the uncomfortable visitors.. She stood tizanidine at the seashore watching a small boy, who seemed to be hers, wading into the water.. Ross was the boy to have drawn courage vicodin from the desperation of their case, and made some decent if not glorious ending.. He had always held them to be a kind alprazolam of litigation which could have been obviated by the prompt killing of the masculine offender--in which case he would have gladly defended the killer.. I just knew it would be like this! chirruped Miss calcium Evelyn.. Through its apparent disregard of all logical claims, it expresses a part of the intellectual content calcium of the dream ideas...
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Sir, I like the way you think! If I win my campaign to be president, perhaps you'd like a position in my administration.
(what's up with this alex dude?)
OK, now I'm going to feel bad leaving this comment... it looks like Alex has put quite a few here that maybe you don't want to read, but I hope you'll read mine...
Hi,
We're on a quest to find blogging dogs, peace-loving dogs for next week's "Dona Nobis Pacem"
Peaceglobe day...(the cats have overtaken the movement so far!!)
Please join!
Thank you.
Second
Blogblast for Peace
6th June 2007
(If you do 'Wordless Wednesday' a Peaceglobe would be fantastic!
and if you know of a general 'Dogs with Blogs' notice board, even better! *lick*)
so...the interloper is a bad guy...? lol..keep up the bloggin..i am very entertained...and i may need some help from you to get rid of the spaz at my house....
The Mum says I can probably pass the CGC test though I have to actually come to her instead of run off and hop like a bunny... but hopping is way more fun you know.
You are kinda mean about your sister. I bet she's nice if you look hard enough! I love everydogbody!
It looks like Alex is selling pharmaceuticals.
Tot, you have no idea. Until your sister comes home with fifteen unnecessary "moperations", you have not felt my pain.
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